Continuing our presentation of the upcoming release Sharanagati, in this post Srila Bhakti Vinod Thakur shows the conditioned souls how to repent for their wicked desires and behaviour. Srila Bhakti Siddhanta Saraswati Thakur prescribed that his followers should sing this song, Amara jivana, every day. Srila Bhakti Sundar Govinda Dev-Goswami Maharaj explains this in the foreword to Sharanagati, which is excerpted here.
Srila Bhakti Sundar Govinda Dev-Goswami Maharaj
We have heard from Srila Guru Maharaj many times that Prabhupad Srila Saraswati Thakur would say especially that the song Amara jivana sada pape rata is very important for practitioners to realise. Srila Guru Maharaj told us that he would say that we must realise the position of our own self. What are we doing? What are we eating? How are our activities going on? We must have some realisation about these things.
I am thinking it is no doubt difficult for everyone to go on living every day without worldly forms of enjoyment. I am always thinking so much about the situation of the conditioned souls in this mundane world. It is unpalatable and very hard, no doubt. But Srila Saraswati Thakur’s advice is that we must clean our mind every day by singing the songs of Sharanagati, and especially this song, Amara jivana sada pape rata. Just as we clean our home when we awaken in the morning by sweeping with a broom, so we should clean our mind by sweeping it with this song. By sweeping our mind with this song, the dirt within it is removed, it becomes cleaned, and our activities are redirected in the proper way. Srila Guru Maharaj told us this many times: it is necessary to sweep clean our minds every day through sankirtan.
Sharanagati
Song Six
āmāra jīvana, sadā pāpe rata,
nāhika puṇyera leśa
parere udvega, diyāchhi ye kata,
diyāchhi jīvere kleśa [1]
āmāra–my; jīvana–life; sadā–always; pāpe–in sin; rata–engaged; nāhika–there is not; puṇyera–of piety; leśa–a trace; parere–to others; udvega–agitation; diyāchhi–I have given; ye–which; kata–so much; diyāchhi–I have given; jīvere–to other souls; kleśa–afflictions. [1]
(1) My life is always engrossed in sin; there is not a trace of piety within it. I have caused others so much anxiety and trouble.
Sri Laghu-chandrika-bhashya
(1) sadā pāpe rata: “Always engrossed in sin.” As Śaṅkar Āchāryaexpresses in his Mohā-mudgara-stotram:
pāpo ’haṁ pāpa-karmāhaṁ pāpātmā pāpa-sambhavaḥ
“I am sinful, my actions are sinful, my soul is sinful, my birth is sinful.”
nija sukha lāgi’, pāpe nāhi ḍari,
dayā-hīna svārtha-para
para-sukhe duḥkhī, sadā mithyā-bhāṣī,
para-duḥkha sukha-kara [2]
nija–my own; sukha–happiness; lāgi’–for the sake; pāpe–in sin; nāhi–do not; ḍari–I fear; dayā–mercy; hīna–devoid of; svārtha–self-interest; para–intent upon; para–of others; sukhe–by the happiness; duḥkhī–distressed; sadā–always; mithyā–lies; bhāṣī–speaking; para–of others; duḥkha–distress; sukha–happiness; kara–producing. [2]
(2) I am never afraid to engage in sinful activities for the sake of my own happiness. I am merciless and selfish. I am distressed by the happiness of others, I am a perpetual liar, and the distress of others pleases me.
aśeṣa kāmanā, hṛdi mājhe mora,
krodhī, dambha-parāyaṇa
mada-matta sadā, viṣaye mohita,
hiṁsā-garva vibhūṣaṇa [3]
aśeṣa–unlimited; kāmanā–sinful desires; hṛdi–in the heart; mājhe–in the interior; mora–my; krodhī–angry; dambha–arrogance; parāyaṇa–filled with; mada–vanity; matta–intoxicated; sadā–always; viṣaye–by mundanity; mohita–infatuated; hiṁsā–malice, jealousy, violence; garva–pride, egotism; vibhūṣaṇa–ornaments. [3]
(3) There are unlimited sinful desires within the core of my heart. I am angry and arrogant, always maddened with vanity, infatuated with mundanity, and ornamented with malice and pride.
(3) dambha-parāyaṇa: “Arrogant.” This refers to a dharma-dhvajī, a hypocrite who makes a show of being religious for mundane purposes (lit. one who waves the flag of dharma but does not practise it).
nidrālasya-hata, sukārye virata,
akārye udyogī āmi
pratiṣṭhā lāgiyā, śāṭhya-ācharaṇa,
lobha-hata sadā kāmī [4]
nidrā–by sleep; alasya–laziness; hata–subdued; sukārye–to good deeds; virata–averse; akārye–for sinful deeds; udyogī–eager; āmi–I; pratiṣṭhā (sammāna)–fame (exaltation); lāgiyā–for; śāṭhya (vañchanā)–deceitful; ācharaṇa–behaviour; lobha–by greed; hata–attacked, destroyed, conquered; sadā–always; kāmī–covetous. [4]
(4) I am subdued by laziness and sleep, averse to performing good deeds, and eager to perform sinful deeds. I engage in deceitful behaviour in pursuit of prestige. I am ruined by greed and constantly covetous.
e hena durjana, sajjana-varjita,
aparādhī nirantara
śubha-kārya-śūnya, sadānartha-manā,
nānā duḥkhe jara jara [5]
e–this; hena–such as; durjana–bad person; sajjana–by devotees; varjita–rejected; aparādhī–an offender; nirantara–incessantly; śubha–good; kārya–motive; śūnya–devoid of; sadā–always; anartha–evil; manā–minded; nānā–various; duḥkhe–by miseries; jara–worn; jara–and torn. [5]
(5) Such a sinner as I is shunned by devotees and is a constant offender. I am devoid of virtuous motives, always intent upon evil, and racked by various miseries.
(5) sadānartha-manā: “Always intent upon evil.” This means incessantly malevolent.
vārddhakye ekhana, upāya-vihīna,
tā’te dīna akiñchana
bhakati-vinoda, prabhura charaṇe,
kare duḥkha nivedana [6]
vārddhakye–in old age; ekhana–now; upāya–means; vihīna–devoid (of any other); tā’te–thereby; dīna–distressed; akiñchana (saṅgati-śūnya)–poor (without means); bhakati-vinoda–Bhakti Vinod; prabhura–of the Lord; charaṇe–at the feet; kare–makes; duḥkha–sorrow; nivedana–submission. [6]
(6) Now aged, I am devoid of any means of deliverance and thus destitute and distressed. Bhakti Vinod submits this remorseful confession at the feet of the Lord.